Tuesday, May 26, 2009

We have a winner!

The winner for the $25.00 gift certificate for ecostore has been randomly picked.........and the winner is.........................Dorlene! Dorlene , I can't find your e-mail address. You can email it to me at ava_collett@hotmail.com. I need it for the company to be able to send you the certificate.It will not be used for any other purpose. Thanks to everyone who entered.

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Contest for ecostore products.......

So I've been trying out this new shampoo for my family and even my dog! It's good for the environment so I figured it had to be better for us too , right? It's from http://www.ecostoreusa.com/ . We tried the Rosemary and Orange shampoo and conditioner. It doesn't lather as much as your usual stuff , but that's because it doesn't have all that nasty artificial stuff in it! And it made our hair feel really clean and soft. And it only takes a tiny bit , so it's a great value for your money.

The dog shampoo was the Herbal Fresh All Natural Shampoo. Our little wiener dog has sensitive skin and would scratch all the time. I didn't realize it was his shampoo until I used this. It doesn't irritate his skin so he doesn't scratch like he did before. I don't have a Meijer store near me , but you can find the products there , or on the website.

Anyway , if you'll visit the website and post a quick comment here , somebody will win a $25.00 gift certificate , then you can see for yourself how great this stuff is! You have until Tuesday morning , so start posting. Thanks!

Mama said there'd be days like this.....

The other day I woke up with a bad headache . I should have just quit my job and went back to bed. But I drug my old tired butt out of the bed (first mistake ) and stumbled to the bathroom and looked in the mirror ( second mistake ). It gets worse every day. I think I was 10 years older than when I went to bed the night before. I had dreamed all night of being chased by robbers. That takes a lot of energy , not to mention the fear of what they would do to me when they caught me and found out I was broke. Anyway , while I was trying to brush my hair , I discovered a bony ridge on my skull. This ridge was right in the middle if my skull , starting at the hairline. It went about 3 inches back , ending exactly where my sunglasses sit. On either side of the ridge were two little trenches. They were pretty deep. Well , great , I thought. During the night some horrible abnormality had formed on my head , and now I had to deal with that , along with all the other crap I was sure I would face that day.
Well ,had to go to work no matter what obscenity was growing out of my head. As I pushed my sunglasses back I noticed that the nose pieces fit PERFECTLY in each little trench. I never wear them on my eyes , just to hold my hair back. I'd been doing it for years , so I decided I would go without them a few days to see if that was causing the problem. Sure enough , the trenches begin to disappear so that the ridge could no longer be felt. Who would have ever thought you could wear TRENCHES in your head with your glasses?

But I'm getting ahead of myself. I wanted to tell you about my DAY. I went on to work and had the usual . You know the kind. I had to pay the bills that day , so when I got home that afternoon , I was as broke as I was when I started. Only difference was my feet were swollen and my back hurt. When I stopped at the mailbox I noticed a letter from the social security. For a moment I felt a flicker of hope. Maybe they had made a mistake on withholding or something? Maybe we were gonna actually have some money left over out of my husbands check each week? I eagerly tore the letter open and this is what it said: "GOOD NEWS! You qualify for a free funeral"! Now who in the *ell do they think that is good news for? Not for me. Maybe for my relatives. Why didn't they send THEM the frigging letter. What a day!

Well , as they say , there's a silver lining in every cloud , so I guess the fact that I have lived long enough to qualify for a free funeral is good news. Hey , I take it where I can get it , you know what I mean? And I'm an optimist at heart , so as I lay my weary head upon my pillow , I knew tomorrow would be a better day! I just wish there was some way to tell those robbers that I 'm broke before they start chasing me again tonight........

Tuesday, May 19, 2009

My sister

Its been hard to write lately. My sister was diagnosed with colon cancer in Feb. She is undergoing very intense chemo right now , and its been kinda hard to think funny thoughts. I've always been really close to her. She is 11 years older than me and she really took care of me alot , instead of my mama. I don't know if I would have ever been taken to a park , or read to or taken swimming , if not for my sister. Shes the one I went to when the growing up girl things started happening. I don't blame my mama at all. I loved her dearly , but she was just raised differently and it was a different time back then. I guess a time when people believed that kids should be seen and not heard.

I pray that my sister will be alright. She is such a special person. She's the kind of person that when the house is full , you can always find people flocked around her. Anyway , I'll get back on track soon. Have a great day , and think of my sis in your prayers.

Sunday, May 3, 2009

Just another day in paradise............

Well gosh , it rained Friday night , all day Saturday and most of today. Saturday morning Cane got out of bed ( my bed ) at 8 am and at 8:15 he said , " I'm bored." So can you tell how my weekend went? By last night we were separating all the pens and pencils in the house , making sure they would write , and then putting them in their own little drawer. Tonight we're planning on mating all the socks. That ought to keep us busy until bedtime , as I haven't mated them since 1999.

I guess since we've been stuck inside with 2 boys all weekend , my husband had nothing else to do , so he started thinking. That by itself , is always dangerous , and produces crazy results. This morning , after he had been thinking awhile , he came into the kitchen where I was ( I've been there for 50 years , so he always knows where to find me ) and said , " Happy Mothers Day ". He was grinning from ear to ear , like he deserved a medal or something , for remembering. Being foolish , I blurted out that it wasn't mothers day until next Sunday. So then he asked me what I wanted for mothers day. In past years my wants were along these lines................

A day at the spa
a new printer
a new purse
a mani/pedi
a gift certificate to Hobby Lobby

you get the picture. Anyway ,he always insisted I tell him exactly what I wanted , how much it was and where he could find it. No surprises there , you're thinking. WRONG. I got a box of NASTY tasting candy , and a stuffed teddy bear. Well , I guess I still get surprised because the color of the teddy bear varies from year to year. So when he asked me this year I said " some chocolates and a teddy bear". Wonder what he'll get me??????????

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Sleeping With The Enemy

Although the cans in my pantry are far from neat , last night I was sleeping with the enemy. And though I don't usually call my family ' the enemy ' ......last night was a nightmare. Picture it : Doug , me , Jordan ,Cane and The Wiener Dog.......all in a bed built for two. Well , you can't really count me , cause I don't think the inch I occupied counts. I'm telling you , it was almost worse than the night The Hermit Crab got in the bed with us. They say that a picture is worth a thousand words , so I'll just show you what we looked like. Notice that even though The Wiener Dog has one , I don't even get a pillow.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Honor Roll

So today they are having an awards ceremony at the school for the honor roll kids. My two boys both got honor roll this time. I do not see how that happened. One of them drags an empty backpack ( containing only a bubble gum wrapper and half of a plastic Easter egg ) back and forth to school every day. There is never anything else in it. Ever. I have even got out of bed in the middle of the night to go look and it was still empty. The other day he called me from school and asked me to bring his backpack cause he had forgotten it. So I drove to the school and handed the principal his backpack and she said , " It feels empty." to which I replied , "It is." She just shrugged and said she'd see that he got it. I have no idea why he needed it so desperately. I don't know.......maybe to bring the other half of the Easter egg home in? Who knows?

Anyway , the other boy has plenty of stuff in His backpack , I'll tell you that much! He has hundreds of papers , and candy wrappers , and toys , and empty glue bottles. And trying to read his papers are like trying to break a secret code. He crumbles them up in a ball so when we uncrumble them they look like maps. and they have been so tightly wadded up that we have to sit a plant or something on the edge to hold the paper down. Then we have to get a magnifying glass to try to read whats on the paper because it is criss crossed with so many lines from being wadded.....well anyway , you get the picture.

So I 'm just saying , I DO NOT SEE HOW THEY GOT HONOR ROLL. but if the school says they did , then it must be so. So the parents will meet in the cafeteria today and see the awards handed out. I of course , am very proud of the boys and will clap and beam accordingly. But I can't help but wonder why we parents never get awards .

Now I know I'm their mother and I'm supposed to do things for them , without expecting anything in return. Take for example , just getting them out of bed in the mornings to get them to school in the first place. I don't mind walking into their room and gently waking them up. I mean I would'nt mind , if that was the way it ever happened. HA! I walk into their room , and step on the skateboard , which sends me flying across the room , knocking over the crab habitat as I go by.Finally , I skate into the bed , where I'm flung down in a heap , onto THE WIENER DOG , who of course tries to attack me. So by then I'm not in a gentle mood , so I scream "GETOUTTATHEBEDANDPUTTHATDOGOUTSIDE!!!

Anyway, so imagine this scene 5 more times before they finally get up. Only I know now to watch out for the skateboard , but you can substitute roller skate, heely, hermit crab, cat, tack..whatever. The item doesn't matter, just know that there is always something dangerous waiting for me in there. So I finally get them out of bed , and they have 10 minutes to washeatdressgrabemptybackpackgetincardrivetoschooljumpoutandgetinclassbeforebellrings....but they make it. On time. I'm Wonder woman , I tell you.

Getting them into the bed at night , and to stay there,is just as hard as getting them up. It's like a 2 or 3 hour long process. Then around midnight , when you think they are asleep , one of them comes out to tell you that he left his shoes (the only pair he'll wear ) down in the creek. So you get the flashlight and go down to the creek to fish them out , THEN you have to wash and dry them. And you can't go to sleep until they're dry because you know , of the BUMP BUMP BUMP. THEN when you drag yourself out of the bed in the morning , he tells you that he's decided to wear a DIFFERENT PAIR OF SHOES!

And you know , when those boys see their teachers , they say , "Good morning , Mrs. so and so , how are you?" When they see me they say , "Did you get me anything?" Now don't you think that not slapping them deserves an award?

Tuesday, April 21, 2009

Finally....I'm back.....

and I'm so happy. I'll be posting stories tonight if anyone is still with me!